


a secret well kept is a tragedy to me

by ampere



Category: Little Mix (Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-01
Updated: 2013-04-01
Packaged: 2017-12-07 05:11:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/744635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ampere/pseuds/ampere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>They keep moving along, and it means they’re getting closer to winning. And that’s great, that’s beyond great, it’s amazing. But all Leigh-Anne thinks about its's that it's just another day with Perrie, another night with Perrie warm and soft under her, one more kiss, one more hand hold. She knows Jade and Jesy are in it to win it, are putting hours and hours to win and come on top, have their hopes and future riding on them moving on.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	a secret well kept is a tragedy to me

**Author's Note:**

> Insipred by this picture.
> 
> Title from ATTWN's Insozzz...

It happens like this, Leigh-Anne doesn’t get into it as a solo artist. It happens like this, they bring her back and there’s three other girls, heartbroken and teary eyed. It happens like this, she takes a look at the blonde hair and the blue eyes and Leigh-Anne knows it’s something weird, a tug on her heart and fuzzy insides.

They hold each other tight, cry and smile because it happens, they get in.

-

The sun is all shining and bright and Perrie glows under it, titters nervously and bites her lip. It happens because Leigh-Anne lets it happen. It happens because Perrie’s gone all nervous and Leigh-Anne takes her behind a wall, kisses her until she stops shivering.

There’s a sharing of breath, quiet little pants and rosy cheeks and Perrie smiles at her, murmurs a quiet thanks.

They hold on tight, and cry and smile and shiver, it happens because they move on.

-

There’s cameras on them, constantly, filming them acting stupid and talking and holding hands. It’s nerve wracking and Leigh-Anne tries hard no to do anything too stupid. It happens because there’s a strict no dating in the house rule, it happens because they have to hide from the cameras. It happens because Leigh-Anne is a girl who starts to love a girl. It’s scary and new and it makes her shake and quiver and smile because she has a secret, she has something that’s only hers. It’s Perrie, it’s the golden Perrie the whole nation gets but Leigh-Anne gets more than that.

It’s scary because it’s happening.

-

It gets a bit too much, it’s Perrie and her laugh and her touch and the sneaking around. It’s Perrie slipping into her bed in the middle of the night, talking about the one or other girl she’s dated. Leigh-Anne’s never dated a girl, Leigh-Anne’s not used to this.

“We’re dating?” she asks when Perrie buries her head to her neck, stray hairs tickling her nose.

“Yeah, we are,” Perrie says quietly. The moon is big and bright and out, and it washes them away in harsh light.

Leigh-Anne smiles, takes a hold of Perrie’s hand, “good, I thought I was doing this wrong.”

-

They have to be careful, they know that. It means not too much touching, not too many heart eyes and flirty smiles. For a while it’s Jade and Perrie, and it claws at Leigh-Anne’s stomach like a beast. Leaves her hot headed and tense. They must be good at it, at hiding it because it takes a while before anyone notices.

It’s Jesy because Jesy is a clever girl and Jesy has eyes like a hawk.

She comes into their room and locks the door.

“I think it’s sweet, and very brave,” she says, smiles at them and gives them her blessing.

-

They kiss a lot, the night before shows, with Perrie jittering under her, whispering little uncertainties, little concerns, about messing up, about leaving, about not seeing Leigh-Anne anymore.

They kiss in corners, in bath rooms stalls, they kiss away from everyone, something they only share. It’s fleeting moments when they can’t hold back, when Leigh-Anne pushes Perrie away to dark places, deserted halls, any place where she can touch and kiss and taste.

It’s more indulgent in their room, under the hush of the night, little chirps of restless grasshoppers and the hush noise of the night in the city.

It’s more time to map Perrie out, to learn all the dips and crannies and curves, taste until she can’t taste Perrie anymore, until it’s just her and Perrie and their breathing, hearts pressed together, beating erratically, too loud and too big.

-

They keep moving along, and it means they’re getting closer to winning. And that’s great, that’s beyond great, it’s amazing. But all Leigh-Anne thinks about its's that it's just another day with Perrie, another night with Perrie warm and soft under her, one more kiss, one more hand hold. She knows Jade and Jesy are in it to win it, are putting hours and hours to win and come on top, have their hopes and future riding on them moving on.

And Leigh-Anne can’t do that, because she thinks, almost a bit afraid, she’s got her future on Perrie. It makes her a bit unnerved. She’s not even twenty and all she can see is Perrie in the years to come.

She looks at Perrie and she sees it all. She looks at Perrie and she has no idea what Perrie wants from her.

-

It happens at night, because that’s how it always happens for them. Little pants and gasps and skin pressed to skin. Skin shiny with sweat, dips and curves Leigh-Anne always wants to touch. It’s warm and slick and so good, it’s so good because it’s Perrie and her mouth and her fingers and her touch. Little whimpers and tiny chants of Leigh-Anne’s name, muffled and breathy and quiet because it’s a secret, it’s their secret, and it has to stay a secret.

Perrie goes all soft and languid. She blurs at the edges, melts into Leigh-Anne. She lays out and lets Leigh-Anne take her. With nervous hands and fingers and mouth because she’s got no idea what she’s going. She has no idea what she’s doing when it comes to Perrie, she hasn’t had an idea since the day they met.

But Perrie just lets her take over, trusts her and that’s so new, the newest thing out of this whole experience.

Perrie is new and exciting and that’s a bit too much for Leigh-Anne.

It happens at night, and it happens again, in less romantic places, in more gritty situations, but it keeps happening and it leaves Leigh-Anne wanting more.

-

She doesn’t even realize a picture is taken, she doesn’t realize it until ages later, after they win, after they start doing what they do everyday, after it means Perrie gets to be with her for many more days. She finds out after they get thousands of more fans, when she’s got so much money, she doesn’t know what to do with.

She laughs because she thought they were better at hiding it, she thought they were fooling everyone. But there’s that picture, Jade intent on Jesy’s little pep talk, and she’s got Perrie pressed to her, like the nights they spend together, close and warm and their hands are linked together, between their hips. But they can’t see that, just the press of their bodies, the closeness of them. It looks like nothing, they’re not even looking at each other, but Leigh-Anne knows, and Perrie knows and Jesy knows. So she laughs because it’s obvious and it’s scary but it happens.


End file.
